Thoughts on Motherhood

With my first Mother's Day as a mother approaching, I've been reflecting a lot about what it means to be a mom.

When I found out I was pregnant with Kate, I started keeping a mental list of what I was going to do as a mother an what I wasn't going to do. I read parenting books, watched movies, and observed everyone around me. The list got longer and longer.

Once I actually became a mother, my list was modified very quickly. Instead of being a list of do's and don'ts, it morphed into a list of what worked and what didn't. I've started to form a new philosophy of motherhood. It goes something like this:

Some moms work and some moms stay home. Some moms homeschool and some moms lovingly help their child pack a backpack every morning before they leave for school. Some moms put their children to bed early and some moms put their children to bed late. Some moms make dinner every night and some moms know all their kids' favorite restaurants and are willing to go there over and over, even if there's nothing on the menu adults actually like. Some moms have lots of kids and some moms have one. Some moms breastfeed and some moms bottle feed. Some moms let their little ones throw wood chips on the playground and some moms would prefer they stay on the ground. Some moms put their baby in a swing and some moms put their baby in a front carrier. Some moms rush over with kisses and bandaids when their child falls and some moms help their wounded little one brush off their own knees. Some moms energetically coax their children into piano lessons every week and some moms play for hours with their children in the back yard. Some moms are by their children's side almost all the time and some moms give their children more independence. Some moms give time-outs and some moms take away TV. Some moms get their kid a goldfish and some moms get their kid a St. Bernard.

In the end, who is right? Who is doing it the right way?

All of them.

Each mother has to pick what is right for herself and her family. That's what being a mother really means! Picking. Choosing. Judging the family and its dynamics and adjusting according to what it needs. I have developed a new respect for my mother, my grandmothers, my mother-in-law, my sister, and all my friends and family who are mothers.

Happy Mother's Day to you all. Keep doing what you're doing!